CHILDREN

YES, I HAVE CHILDREN. I AM SO THANKFUL FOR THEM, AND ALTHOUGH I GAVE BIRTH TO 5 CHILDREN, ONLY 3 STILL REMAIN ON THIS EARTH. I HAVE HAD SO MANY LOVING FRIENDS AND FAMILY ASK ME HOW I CAN WITHSTAND SUCH A TRIAL AS LOSING A CHILD. I CAN ONLY SAY, THAT THERE IS NO ALTERNATIVE. AT ONE POINT, AFTER BOBBIE JO DIED, I FELT THAT IT WAS TOO HARD TO KEEP GOING, AND WANTED SO MUCH TO END THE PAIN. BUT THEN, I REALIZED THAT IF IT WAS HARD TO LOSE HER, HOW MUCH WOULD I HURT MY FAMILY IF I TOOK A COWARDS WAY OUT? AND, I AM MANY THINGS, BUT I AM NO COWARD! (REMEMBER ME? MORE COURAGE THAN SENSE?) SO, I WOULD LIKE TO TELL YOU THAT REMEMBERING MY CHILDREN, HUSBAND, FRIENDS AND FAMILY HAS BEEN THE REASON THAT I SEEM TO BE HANDLING THINGS SO WELL. WRITING THIS BLOG HAS BEEN SO HELPFUL TO ME AND KNOWING THAT OTHERS BESIDES MYSELF ARE READING MY WORDS MAKES ME SO HAPPY. I ENJOY SHARING MY THOUGHTS WITH YOU. SO, HERE ARE SOME MORE THOUGHTS TO SHARE WITH YOU1
I HAVE BEEN TALKING QUITE A LOT ABOUT OUR LITTLE FARM ANIMALS. YES, IT WAS A LOT OF WORK, BUT VERY REWARDING. WHEN I WOULD GET DOWN, I WOULD GO AND SIT ON MY CHICKEN BUCKET IN THE CHICKEN YARD, AND THE CHICKENS WOULD SURROUND ME, MAKING LITTLE CLUCKING SOUNDS. WE HAD FAT BLACK SPOTTED CHICKENS, CHUBBY WHITE CHICKENS, LARGE RED CHICKENS AND EVEN SOME LITTLE CHICKENS THAT LAYED DIFFERENT COLORED EGGS. WE ALSO HAD SOME GEESE. GEESE ARE MEAN! NO MATTER HOW GOOD YOU ARE TO THEM, THEY ARE JUST BIDING THEIR TIME UNTIL THEY CAN GET YOU. THE LAY IN WAIT FOR YOU TO TURN YOUR BACK AND THEN, GOTCHA! THE PINCH YOU WITH THEIR BEAKS AND IT REALLY HURTS! WHEN WE HAD TO GATHER THE EGGS, WE WOULD TAKE A STICK AND GENTLY HERD THE GEESE OUT OF THE CHICKEN YARD. THEY DID NOT WANT TO GIVE UP THEIR EGGS NO MATTER WHAT. WELL, THEY COULD KEEP THEIR OLD EGGS, I DIDN'T WANT THEM-BUT SINCE THEY SHARED THE CHICKEN YARD, I HAD TO RUN THOSE GEESE OUT TO GATHER THE HEN'S EGGS. (AND BY THE WAY, HENS DON'T SEEM TO MIND GIVING UP THEIR EGGS). ANYWAY, ONE DAY, I WAS IN A BIT OF A HURRY, AND HAD TO GATHER THE EGGS ALONG WITH OTHER CHORES THAT WERE WAITING. USUALLY I CAREFULLY COUNTED THOSE GEESE TO MAKE SURE THAT ALL OF THEM HAD BEEN HERDED OUT, BUT ON THAT PARTICULAR DAY, I JUST SHOOED THEM OUT WITHOUT THINKING. WE HAD PEOPLE THAT WOULD BUY THE GEESE EGGS, AND SO I HAD TO GATHER THEM TOO, AND WENT OVER TO THE GEESE'S NESTS. WE HAD CUT 50 GALLON METAL BARRELS IN HALF TO MAKE ROOSTS FOR THE GEESE, AND SO I HAD TO REACH IN TO GET THE EGGS FROM EACH BARREL. MY MIND WAS ANYWHERE BUT ON THE CHORE OF GATHERING EGGS, AND I REACHED INTO ONE OF THE BARRELS, ONLY TO SUDDENLY FIND AN ANGRY GOOSE! SHE SNAKED HER LONG NECK AND GRABBED THE FAT PART OF MY ARM, TWISTING VICIOUSLY WITH HER BEAK AND SCARING THE ABSOLUTE CRAP OUT OF ME. I SCREAMED, DROPPED MY GATHERED EGGS AND JUMPED BACK, FALLING ON MY BACKSIDE. THAT GOOSE CAME FLYING AT ME AND WITHOUT THINKING, I HAULED OFF AND SLAPPED HER A GOOD ONE. IT IS A GOOD THING HER NECK DID NOT SLAP INTO A KNOT, I SLAPPED HER SO HARD. SHE WOBBLED OFF AND I FELT TERRIBLE, BUT NOT FOR LONG AS I EXAMINED MY UNDERARM TO FIND A HUGE RED SPOT AND A BRUISE ALREADY STARTING. NOW, YOU MAY WONDER WHY WE WOULD EVEN KEEP GEESE. WELL, THERE IS NOTHING BETTER FOR A WATCHDOG THAN A GOOSE. THEY REALLY GUARD THE YARD, AND WILL LET NOTHING IN. A DOG MAY EAT THE CHICKENS, SO THEY DON'T ALWAYS WORK OUT. IF SUGAR BEAR WENT TO THE CHICKEN YARD, ONE OF THE GEESE WOULD DISTRACT HER AND THE OTHER SIX WOULD GET BEHIND HER AND ATTACK HER BACKSIDE! SHE NEVER BOTHERED THE CHICKENS, SHE LEARNED QUICKLY. THERE WAS ALWAYS SOME KIND OF LITTLE DRAMA GOING ON AROUND THE FARM YARD. OUR LITTLE FARM HAD A SMALL BARN TO HOLD THE HAY AND FEED. ONE DAY, WHEN AARON WAS ONLY A LITTLE TODDLER, HE FOLLOWED DAD TO THE BARN TO SEE THE COW GET MILKED. I TOLD MARTIN TO WATCH HIM, BUT MARTIN DID NOT HEAR ME. I FOLLOWED THEM BECAUSE I WAS WORRIED BECAUSE THE COW HAD A LITTLE CALF THAT WOULD BOLT OUT OF THE BARN THE MINUTE THE DOOR WAS OPENED AND IF YOU WERE NOT EXPECTING IT WOULD KNOCK YOU DOWN. MARTIN DIDN'T REALIZE THAT AARON WAS FOLLOWING HIM AND OPENED THE DOOR- AND IMMEDIATLEY THE CALF BOLTED OUT AS USUAL. LITTLE AARON WAS RIGHT BEHIND MARTIN, AND THE CALF KNOCKED HIM DOWN AND STEPPED ON HIS HEAD! I SCREAMED AND RAN FOR AARON-WHO WAS SQUASHED IN THE MUD. THANK GOODNESS IT WAS MUDDY, BECAUSE WHEN THE CALF STEPPED ON HIM, HE JUST SQUISHED DOWN AND THE HOOF DID NOT HURT HIM. I GRABBED HIM AND WAS HYSTERICAL, BUT MARTIN WAS COOL AS USUAL AND TOOK AARON TO EXAMINE HIM. NO DAMAGE, AND HE WAS OKAY, BUT THE NEXT DAY, HE HAD A PERFECT HOOF PRINT ON HIS FOREHEAD. GO FIGURE. ONE MORE BLESSING AND WORK FOR OUR GUARDIAN ANGELS! ANOTHER TIME,4 YEAR OLD JESSICA HAD LET THE HORSES FROM THE BACK FIELD COME INTO THE YARD. SHE HAD A STICK AND WAS CHASING THEM THROUGH THE YARD, AND I TOLD HER TO QUIT BECAUSE THEY COULD KICK HER. I SHOOED THEM BACK TO THE FIELD AND WENT BACK TO WHAT I WAS DOING. JESSICA SNEAKED BEHIND MY BACK AND WENT INTO THE FIELD, AGAIN CHASING THE HORSES WITH A STICK. I WENT OUT THERE AND WENT TO TELL HER TO QUIT, WHEN ALL OF A SUDDEN I HEARD A "CLOP!" AND SAW MY LITTLE GIRL FLYING END OVER END IN THE AIR. AS USUAL, I SCREAMED AND RAN TO HER. SHE HAD LANDED ON HER BACK, AND I WAS SCREAMING HER NAME OVER AND OVER AND ALSO FOR MARTIN TO COME. JESSICA JUMPED UP, GRABBED THE FRONT OF ME AND LITERALLY CLIMBED UP MY SHIRT, WRAPPING HER LEGS AROUND MY THROAT. "MAMA, MAMA, WHAT'S WRONG? WHY ARE YOU YELLING LIKE THAT? ARE ONE OF THE HORSES HURT?" SHE CRIED. ALTHOUGH ONE OF THOSE HORSES KICKED HER INTO THE AIR, SHE WAS UNHURT! NOTHING, NO BRUISES, NOTHING. SHE WAS WORRIED ABOUT ME THOUGH, SHE DIDN'T KNOW WHY I WAS SO UPSET. AGAIN, GO FIGURE! IT IS A WONDER THAT I EVEN REMAINED SANE DURING THOSE DAYS. AARON GOT STUCK ON TOP OF THE PIG HOUSE AND COULDN'T GET DOWN, UNTIL A NEIGHBOR SAW HIM AND CAME TO GET ME. ONCE, LITTLE OTTO WAS ON TOP OF THE SWING SET, FELL, LANDED ON THE BAR ON THE END OF THE SWING SET, DID A FLIP, LANDED ON HIS BACKSIDE AND LOOKED AT ME AND SAID, "TA-DA". (I WAS HAVING A HEART ATTACK AS I WATCHED HIS DESCENT). ONE OF THE NEIGHBORS CALLED ME ONE DAY AND TOLD ME TO LOOK OUTSIDE. SURE ENOUGH, THERE WAS AARON, A TODDLER, STANDING ON TOP OF THE NEIGHBORS PICK-UP TRUCK, NAKED AND DANCING TO BEAT THE BAND. IT REALLY SOUNDS LIKE I WAS A TERRIBLE MOTHER, BUT I HOPE NOT. I TRIED TO KEEP UP WITH EVERYONE, AND MOST OF THE TIME I DID, BUT THEY WANTED TO PLAY OUTSIDE AND WE WERE IN THE COUNTRY, SO I FELT THEY WERE PRETTY SAFE. ALL IN ALL, WE WERE SO BLESSED. MORE TOMORROW, LOVE, NANASEE