THE FIRST DAY OF HIGH SCHOOL

OH, GOODNESS, THE BIG DAY HAD COME. I WAS GOING TO HIGH SCHOOL! AND, I WAS GOING TO HIGH SCHOOL FROM THE CHILDREN'S HOME. BY NOW, IT WAS APPARENT THAT MOTHER HAD MORE LONG TERM PLANS FOR US AT THE HOME, BUT I HAD NO SENSE OF HOW LONG, SO THERE WAS RATHER AN OPEN END IN MY LIFE. IT HAD BEEN ABOUT 4 WEEKS SINCE MOTHER HAD BROUGHT TO THE HOME, AND THOSE FOUR WEEKS WERE PIVOTAL FOR ME. SO MUCH HAD HAPPENED, SO MUCH GOOD, MORE THAN I EVER EXPECTED. I HAD MADE FRIENDS, AND I HAD A PLACE IN THAT SMALL SOCIETY OF THE HOME. I HAD CLOTHES TO WEAR, FOOD WHENEVER I WANTED IT AND WAS LEARNING THE VALUE OF BEING COOPERATIVE AND A PART OF A GROUP. MY TINY SPACE IN THIS UNIVERSE OF LIFE WAS MY BED, DRESSER AND THE SMALL THINGS THAT WERE PRECIOUS TO ME. OF COURSE, I STILL HAD THE BIRDS TOO, AND THEY SEEMED TO BE PETS TO ME. WE COULDN'T HAVE PETS, BUT THOSE BIRDS WERE THERE EVERY DAY, AND WOULD EAT THE CRUMBS THAT I WOULD LEAVE FOR THEM UNDER THE BRANCHES OF THE HUGE TREE OUTSIDE MY WINDOW. I CONSIDERED THEM MY BIRDS. LOOKING BACK, THEY WERE JUST ORDINARY SPARROWS OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT. I NEVER DID TELL ANYONE HOW I FELT ABOUT THEM, IT WAS MY "SECRET GARDEN".
THE WEEKS WENT BY QUICKLY, AND BEFORE I KNEW IT, IT WAS TIME FOR SCHOOL TO START. MY CLOTHES WERE NOT FASHIONABLE, AND MY HAIR WAS SHORT IN THE TIME OF "HIPPIE LONG" HAIR. BUT, THESE THINGS WERE NOT OF CONCERN, I JUST WANTED TO ENJOY THIS EXCITING NEW PHASE OF MY LIFE. THE FIRST MORNING, THE BELL RANG TO CALL US TO BREAKFAST. I JUMPED UP, AND QUICKLY MADE MY BED. MY CLOTHES WERE READY, ALL HUNG OUT AND AT MY FINGERTIPS. I SHOWERED THE NIGHT BEFORE, SO THAT WASN'T A PROBLEM. THE BRAS WE HAD WERE COTTON, WITH NO STRETCH AND VERY POINTY. (MOST OF US DID NOT HAVE THE GOODS TO DO THESE BRAS ANY JUSTICE). OUR BRAS AND PANITES WERE SNOWY WHITE, (AND BOY, THEY BETTER STAY THAT WAY) AND THE SLIPS WERE FULL SLIPS. SO, WE WORE A COTTON BRA AND PANTIES, AND A FULL SLIP AND THEN A BLOUSE AND A SKIRT. SO MANY LAYERS! ALL OF US HAD TO LOOK SOMEWHAT ALIKE SO THAT WE PRESENTED UNIFORMITY FROM THE HOME, BUT THAT ONLY MADE US STAND OUT AT THE PUBLIC SCHOOL WE ATTENDED. WHEN I FINALLY DRESSED AND WENT INTO THE DINING ROOM, I SAW AN UNUSUAL RITUAL TAKING PLACE. BEFORE WE COULD TAKE OUR SEATS, THE MATRON WOULD MAKE US KNEEL BEFORE HER. NOW, THIS WAS NOT TO WORSHIP HER, ( I BET SHE WOULD HAVE LIKED US TO) BUT TO MEASURE THE LENGTH OF OUR SKIRTS. OUR SKIRTS HAD TO TOUCH THE FLOOR WHEN WE WERE KNEELING OR WE COULD NOT WEAR THEM. OF COURSE, MOST OF THE GIRLS HIKED THEIR SKIRTS UP AFTER LEAVING THE COTTAGE AND GETTING OFF CAMPUS, BUT FOR THE INSPECTION, THEY HAD BETTER PASS. ALSO, THE MATRON CHECKED TO SEE IF ALL OF OUR BUTTONS WERE BUTTONED UP TO OUR CHIN, THAT OUR SHIRTS WERE SPOTLESS AND THAT WE HAD PUT ON DEODORANT. SO, THIS IS WHAT GREETED ME THAT FIRST MORNING. GIRLS KNEELING, THEN STANDING, TURNING AROUND AND LASTLY SHOWING OFF THEIR ARMPITS. IF SOMEONE HAD ON TOO MUCH MAKE-UP, THE MATRON WOULD LICK HER FINGER AND SMEAR IT. THEN SHE WOULD MAKE THE GIRL SIT THROUGH BREAKFAST WITH SMEARED MAKE-UP, AND THE POOR GIRL WOULD HAVE TO HOPE THAT SHE HAD TIME TO REPAIR HER FACE BEFORE WE HAD TO LEAVE. THE GIRLS WERE WISE TO THIS OLD MATRON. MOST OF THEM WOULD APPEAR AT THE TABLE WITH FRESHLY SCRUBBED FACES, DEVOID OF MAKE-UP. THEN, WHEN BREAKFAST WAS OVER, THEY WOULD FIX THEIR FACES AND THEN LEAVE. THEY WERE REALLY GOOD AT APPLYING MAKE-UP QUICKLY, AND SOME OF THEM COULD DO MAKE-UP WHILE WALKING TO SCHOOL. I GUESS YOU DO WHAT YOU HAVE TO DO.
THAT FIRST MORNING, I WALKED TO SCHOOL WITH PATTY AND SOME OF THE OTHER GIRLS. OF THE 15 IN THE COTTAGE, ONLY 7 OF US WENT TO HIGH SCHOOL AND THE REST, STILL ELEMENTARY. IN THOSE DAYS, WE DID NOT HAVE JR.HIGH. IT WAS GRADE K THROUGH 7 FOR ELEMENTARY, AND GRADE 8 THROUGH 12 FOR HIGH SCHOOL. I WAS GOING INTO THE 8TH GRADE. WE HAD TO WALK THROUGH THE SMALL TOWN OF HAPEVILLE GEORGIA TO GET TO THE SCHOOL. WE LEFT THE CAMPUS, WALKED A BIT DOWN A SIDE STREET, CROSSED SOME RAIL ROAD TRACKS AND CAME TO MAIN STREET. WE CONTINUED DOWN MAIN STREET, AND THEN TURNED ONTO A STREET WHERE THE SCHOOL WAS LOCATED AT THE DEAD END. THE SCHOOL WAS 3 STORY AND VERY OLD. THE FRONT DOOR WAS LOCATED AT THE TOP OF SOME CEMENT STAIRS, AND THE KIDS WALKING IN AND OUT, UP AND DOWN, LOOKED LIKE WORKER BEES ON A MISSION. STUDENTS WERE STANDING AROUND IN CLUSTERS, SOME OF THEM PAIRED WITH BOYS AND GIRLS, SOME JUST GIRLS, SOME SMOKING ON THE SIDE OF THE BUILDING, SOME PARKING CARS. IT WAS THE MONTH OF SEPTEMBER AND THE WEATHER WAS STILL WARM. THE WALK HAD MADE MY FACE FLUSHED, I WAS A BIT SWEATY, AND I WISHED I LOOKED AS COOL AND CALM AS THE OTHER KIDS SEEMED TO. I DECIDED THAT I SHOULD WALK INSIDE AND LOOK FOR MY HOME ROOM. SINCE IT WAS THE FIRST DAY, QUITE A FEW OF THE STUDENTS WERE ALREADY SEATED WHEN I GOT THERE. AS I WALKED IN, HEADS TURNED TO CHECK ME OUT. THERE I STOOD, 5'10", JUST OVER 200 POUNDS, AND DRESSED LIKE ONE OF THE "ORPHANS". I HAD ON DARK RIMMED GLASSES TOO, AND RIGHT AWAY, SOMEONE WHISPERED, (LOUDLY)"OH LOOK. ANOTHER ONE OF THOSE ORPHANS!" NO ONE GREETED ME, SO I JUST WALKED TO THE BACK OF THE ROOM AND TOOK A SEAT. FROM THERE I WATCHED THE "PEACOCKS" ARRIVE. GIRLS WITH BRIGHT COLORS, FASHIONABLE AT THE TIME, MINI-SKIRTS, KNEE SOCKS AND VARIED SHOE STYLES. THEIR HAIR SWUNG DOWN THEIR BACKS IN RHYTHM WITH THEIR WALK. EYE SHADOWS WERE BRIGHT WHITES AND PASTELS, AND EYELASHES WERE THICK WITH MASCARA. LIPSTICKS WERE ULTRA-SHINY CORALS, PINKS AND EVEN ALMOST WHITE. MOST OF THEM STYLED THEIR HAIR AFTER CHER, WHO WAS A FASHION ICON AT THE TIME. THIS MEANT BANGS CUT STRAIGHT ACROSS JUST BELOW THE EYEBROW, AND STRAIGHT DOWN THE BACK, AND AGAIN CUT STRAIGHT ACROSS. AS EACH GIRL OR BOY ARRIVED, THEY GLANCED MY WAY, AND THEN TOOK A SECOND LOOK. I BEGAN TO FEEL MORE AND MORE SELF-CONCIOUS. I WANTED TO GET UP AND LEAVE. CONVERSATIONS WERE FLYING AS THOSE SEPARATED BY THE SUMMER WERE REUNITED. AS I SAT THERE, FEELING SO DESPERATE, I HEARD A VOICE NEXT TO ME. ONE OF THE MOST BEAUTIFUL GIRLS I HAD EVER SEEN STOOD THERE, LONG HAIR, SHORT SKIRT, PERFECT MAKEUP, SHINY LOAFERS, (WITH A PENNY IN THE SLIT AT THE TOP OF THE LOAFER) OVAL NAILS AND A SMILE FOR ME. PUTTING HER HAND OUT SHE SAID, "HELLO, YOU ARE ONE OF THE NEW KIDS AT THE HOME, AREN'T YOU? I CAN TELL, BECAUSE YOU LOOK LOST. AND OF COURSE, YOU DRESS LIKE THEM." SHE TOLD ME HER NAME AND SAT DOWN NEXT TO ME. "LISTEN, YOU WILL BE OKAY. IF YOU NEED ANY HELP, I AM RIGHT HERE." SHE WAS AN ANGEL. HER NAME WAS CLARICE. MY HEART SWELLED TO BURSTING WITH GRATITUDE. I SMILED AT HER, AND SHE ASKED MY NAME. "JODIE" I SAID. AND THEN, I DON'T KNOW WHY, BUT I ADDED, "MOST OF THE KIDS CALL ME PORKY". SHE LOOKED SHOCKED. "PORKY? WHY? THAT IS NOT VERY NICE!" SHE EXCLAIMED. "OH NO" I ASSURED HER, "THEY ARE NOT BEING MEAN, I GUESS IT IS BECAUSE I REMIND THEM OF PORKY PIG!" NOW, NO ONE HAD EVER CALLED ME "PORKY". I GUESS I THOUGHT THAT IF I HAD A NICKNAME, THEN SHE WOULD THINK I WAS COOL. THAT JUST GOES TO SHOW THE LEVEL OF MY SELF-ESTEEM. SHE TOLD ME THAT I SHOULD TELL THEM TO NEVER CALL ME PORKY AGAIN, IT WOULD MAKE ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MYSELF. YES, SHE WAS AN ANGEL. SHE SAT NEAR ME AND BY NOW, THE ROOM HAD ALL BUT FILLED UP. I GOT THE SECOND LIFE-CHANGING EXPERIENCE OF THE DAY. IN WALKED A TALL, BLONDE HAIRED BOY, TANNED,LOOSE LIMBED, LANKY, GRINNING, SO VERY CUTE AND INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE. HE WAS SMILING, AND HAD GORGEOUS WHITE TEETH. HE PASSED THROUGHT THE ROOM, JOKING AND FLIRTING. I RECALL THAT HE HAD ON KHAKI PANTS AND A BLUE SHIRT. HE WAS WEARING CONVERSE TENNIS SHOES AND HIS HAIR WAS CURLING AT THE BASE OF HIS HEAD. HIS EYES WERE BLUE AND CRINKLED WITH HUMOR. I THINK I FELL IN LOVE AT FIRST SIGHT. THEN, HE SAT DOWN NEXT TO CLARICE, AND TEASED HER HAIR, RUNNING HIS FINGERS THROUGH THE END OF IT. SHE TURNED TO HIM WITH A GLOWING SMILE AND TOUCHED HIS ARM. "WILL, MEET JODIE. SHE IS NEW IN THE HOME." WILL GRUNTED SOMETHING IN MY DIRECTION, BUT HE ONLY HAD EYES FOR CLARICE. LUCKY, LUCKY CLARICE. PERFECT CLARICE. AND TO ME, SHE WAS. SHE WAS KIND, LOVELY AND MADE ME FEEL GOOD. AND, SHE OBVIOUSLY HAD WILL. THE HOME ROOM TEACHER WALKED IN AND WE ALL SETTLED DOWN. WE RECEIVED THE USUAL WELCOME BACK TO SCHOOL SPEECH, AND SINCE WE WERE 8TH GRADERS, A QUICK RUN DOWN ON WHAT TO EXPECT IN OUR NEW SCHOOL. MY HEAD WAS SOON BURSTING WITH INFORMATION ON LOCKERS, PAD LOCKS, TIME SCHEDULES, CLASSES, DRESS CODES AND SO MUCH MORE. PANIC SET IN. I COULDN'T REMEMBER EVERYTHING! I COULDN'T REMEMBER HOW TO GET TO THOSE CLASSES, COULD I? COULD I MAKE IT IN TIME? WHAT IF I HAD TO GO THE THE BATHROOM? WHERE WERE THEY ANYWAY? BUT, WE WEREN'T EXPECTED TO GET IT ALL RIGHT AWAY, AND THE TEACHER EXPLAINED THAT HELP WOULD BE THERE IF WE NEEDED IT. MY CLASSES WERE THE USUAL ENGLISH, MATH, SOCIAL STUDIES, WITH PE, HOMEMAKING AND OF ALL THINGS, LATIN. I CAN'T RECALL WHY I CHOSE LATIN, AND TO LOOK BACK, IT WAS WASTED TIME. THE MORNING PASSED IN CONFUSION, AND SOON IT WAS TIME FOR LUNCH. WE HERDED TO THE CAFETERIA LIKE BOVINE LEMMINGS. I STOOD IN LINE AND SLOWLY MADE MY WAY TO THE FRONT. THERE WAS MYSTERY MEAT, VEGETABLES, BREAD AND MILK. I GOT A TRAY, AND THEN, IT OCCURRED TO ME THAT I DIDN'T KNOW HOW I WAS GOING TO PAY FOR IT. AS I REACHED THE CASHIER, SHE LOOKED ME UP AND DOWN AND SAID, "ARE YOU ONE OF THE KIDS FROM THE HOME?" I SAID YES, AND SHE HANDED ME A PEN. "SIGN YOUR NAME ON THE LIST AND MOVE ALONG". IT SEEMED THAT THE WORLD HAD GROUND TO A HALT. ALL EYES WERE ON ME, AS THE OTHER STUDENTS WAITED TO PAY FOR THEIR LUNCH. SOMEONE YELLED, "HURRY UP!" I LOOKED AROUND, AND THE CASHIER SNAPPED, "COME ON, SIGN YOUR NAME! RIGHT THERE! HURRY UP!" SO, I DID, AND I KNEW THAT NOT ONLY DID EVERYONE KNOW I LIVED AT THE HOME, BUT OBVIOUSLY, I WAS AN IGNORANT "ORPHAN". ENGULFED WITH EMBARRASSMENT,I GRABBED MY TRAY, AND TRIED TO FIND A TABLE TO BE BY MYSELF. THEY WERE PRETTY MUCH FULL. FINALLY, I HAD TO ASK IF I COULD JOIN A GROUP, AND TO MY SURPRISE, THE CHEERFULLY AGREED. THIS WAS TO BE MY FIRST MEETING WITH A GROUP OF GIRLS WHO WOULD BEFRIEND ME FOR THE REST OF MY TIME AT THE SCHOOL. UPON BEING ASKED MY NAME, I BLURTED OUT, "PORKY!" AND TO THEIR SHOCKED LOOKS, ASSURRED THEM THAT MY REAL NAME WAS JODIE, AND THAT PORKY WAS A NICKNAME THAT I DID NOT ENCOURAGE. SOON, WE WERE TALKING, MOSTLY ABOUT LIFE AT THE HOME. THEY WEREN'T BEING MEAN, JUST CURIOUS. I DID NOT MIND DESCRIBING LIFE AT THE HOME AND THEY LISTENED ATTENTIVELY. ONE OF THEM TOLD ME THAT LAST YEAR, THEY HAD TRIED TO TALK TO ONE OF THE GIRLS FROM THE HOME AND SHE HAD JUST GOTTEN ANGRY. I LAUGHED AND TOLD THEM THAT I DIDN'T MIND, AND TO ASK ANYTHING. BEFORE I KNEW IT, LUNCH WAS OVER. THE DAY PASSED AND I HAD TO WALK BACK TO THE HOME. ALL IN ALL, MY FIRST DAY WASN'T SO BAD, AND ON THE WAY BACK, MY BROTHER GEORGE CAUGHT UP TO ME AND WE WERE ABLE TO BE TOGETHER. WHEN I GOT TO THE COTTAGE, I DID MY HOMEWORK, MY CHORES AND SAT ON MY BED, THINKING ABOUT THE DAY. THROUGH MY OPEN WINDOW, I HEARD THE BIRDS. I FELT LIKE THEY WERE GREETING ME, WELCOMING ME HOME. IT WAS VERY COMFORTING. I TOLD MYSELF TO REMEMBER TO GET SOME CRUMBS FOR THEM AFTER DINNER. WE HAD SUPPER, DID SOME MORE CHORES AND THEN GATHERED TO WATCH TV AND TALK ABOUT THE DAY. MRS. THOMPSON SURPRISED US WITH HOT CHOCOLATE BEFORE WE WENT TO BED, AND THEN IT WAS LIGHTS OUT. I GOT READY FOR BED, TOOK OFF MY LOVELY LITTLE GREEN RING AND HID IT IN THE DRAWER. AS I PLACED IT IN THE BACK OF THE DRAWER, MY FINGERS TOUCHED THE MAKE-UP THAT LAY HIDDEN. I THOUGHT TO MYSELF THAT ONE DAY, I WOULD GET PATTY OR ONE OF THE GIRLS TO SHOW ME HOW TO USE IT. FOR NOW, IT WAS MY TREASURE. CROSSING THE ROOM, I LAY IN MY BED IN THE DARK AND TRACED THE OUTLINE OF THE WAFFLE WEAVE OF THE BEDSPREAD. DRAWING IN THE SCENT OF THE STARCHED AND BLEACHED LINEN, I REFLECTED ON THE DAY. THERE WAS SO MUCH TO LOOK FORWARD TO. LISTENING FOR THE BIRDS IN THE MORNING, GOING TO SCHOOL, MEETING MY NEW FRIENDS AND WATCHING FOR WILL. ALTHOUGH HE DID NOT KNOW I WAS ALIVE, HE WAS STILL GOOD TO LOOK AT. I WAS HAPPY FOR CLARICE, HE SEEMED TO LIKE HER SO MUCH. THAT WAS ENOUGH FOR ME. SHE DESERVED IT, AS SHE WAS AN ANGEL.