Summer Days

For those of you who may be following my story, I have not been writing because I was so distressed over Rocky, (our german shepherd) and his getting lost. He is home now and all is fine, buy I cried myself sick while he was gone, and it really affected me. Now, back to the story.

I left you at the peach farm. I had a wonderful time there, got along so well with the family and learned so much. We swam in the creek, (in our underwear!) and I imagined that the handsome older son liked me. He was so incredible, so tall with his muscular body and golden blonde hair. I looke all I wanted behind his back, but when he talked to me, I just dissolved in fits of giggles. I was such a girl! But new feelings were blooming inside me and I didn't know how to handle them. The girls and I took long walks along country roads, and at night, we talked and giggled, and swore that when I had to go back to the home, we would write and keep in touch. I was there at the farm for two weeks and loved every moment. On the last day, the mother asked me if I would like to live with them. I answered enthusiastically that I would, but I never thought it was any more than just a question. When we got into the car to go back to the home, the girls and I cried and hugged and repeated the vow that we would keep in touch. It was a very hot day in June when I went back home and I got terribly car sick on the way. I found myself on several occasions leaning over the pavement while I retched and heaved. After a while, it was just dry heaving, but I could not seem to stop. I have always had a problem with motion sickness, and this time I was just so embarrassed because the family had been so good to me. Each time I had to get out of the car, the mother would help me by wiping my face and holding me up. I realized just how kind she was, and I thought that perhaps it would be a wonderful life to live with this family. The steamy Georgia countryside drummed by as we drove south to the home. It was so cool and refreshing in the northern part of the state, but as we continued toward Hapeville, it seemed to become more and more muggy and miserable. When we arrived at the home, the mother took my things and walked me inside the cottage. She looked around my room and admired the few things I had aquired, especially remarking on my stuffed pig that kept it's vigil on the pillow on my bed. Standing in my room, she took me in her ample arms and told me that everything would be alright. I knew I would never see her again, and I sniffed my goodbye to her. I hugged her and told her that I had really enjoyed my time with her family, and that I would miss them. Again, she embraced me and told me that Heavenly Father would provide for me. She got in the car and they drove off, while I watched until the tail light dissapeared onto the highway. I later found out that this family had offered to adopt me, but my mother would not agree. I had mixed feelings about that. I had a wonderful reunion with Mindy, she had not gone anywhere yet that summer and had been alone while I was gone. I had so much to tell her. I embellished a bit about my "relationship" with the older boy and Mindy ohhhed and ahhhed at each detail. We were so glad to be together again, and talked about our plans for the rest of the summer. One day soon after my return home, a terrible thing happened. Mindy and I were out in the yard sunning ourselves, when we heard a terrific boom and the ground shook beneath us. We jumped up in fright and ran inside to see what awful thing must have happened. It was indeed awful, but not at the home. Close by, behind the campus of the home was a nursery filled with babies and small children along with the nursery workers. A gas line had ruptured, and the building exploded with everyone inside. Within minutes, sirens were screaming to the scene and everything was in chaos. The smoke was billowing above the nearby trees and Mindy and I rushed to go and see what had happened. The trail behind the campus leading to the nursery was not very long, and it didn't take long to reach a scene that I will never forget. There before me was what was left of a large two story building, some of the walls having collapsed and the rest in flames. Firefighters were on the scene and ambulances were lining up on the street. When we were spotted by a firefighter, he told us to get on home and get out of the way. I wish I had listened to him, but I didn't and Mindy and I sneaked behind a fence that had partially collapsed. Peering over the top of what remained of the fence, I was shocked to find little bodies blackened and scattered on the ground and even body parts. There was a hand and part of a leg. I noticed little shoes too, and toys. A teddy bear was lying in a puddle and other toys were black and smoking. Parents had begun to arrive and were trying to get into the burning building for their children. One mother in particular was absolutely hysterical, screaming for her baby. There was so much screaming and it seemed that the sirens of the ambulances and the wailing of the victims seemed to blend in together. I don't know how many were killed or injured, because it didn't take long for my mind to kind of shut down from the shock. I do remember someone grabbing my shoulder and yanking me away from the fence. Once again, Mindy and I were told to go home, but my legs did not seem to want to carry me. I trembled like a leaf in a hurricane and my teeth chattered as I gasped for breath. I knew I was sobbing, and must have mirrored the terror on Mindy's face. Together we staggered away from the awful scene, crying and gagging all the way back home. What a horrible thing to have happened to those little children. It would be a long time before I could think of the incident and not become very upset. It was the talk of the home for quite some time, but I could never join in. Talking about it made it seem real all over again, and I just wanted to forget.
The summer passed on, lazy and hot. We swam in the pool, played cards and watched tv. I learned how interesting a soap opera can be. The older girls watched them every day, and I soon became interested as well. My favorite one was called "Another World". I learned to love Rachel and Russel, the main characters of the story along with Ada, Rachel's mother. I finally had something to talk about with all the girls as we compared our opinions of the cast and story of the soaps. At night, we would pop corn and visit in each other's rooms. One room in particular was Frankie's room. She was still the cottage alpha dog, and the girls migrated to her room most of the time. I ventured in one night and no one seemed to object. Soon, I was involved in the conversation and began to enjoy myself. After that, Mindy and I went often to Frankie's room to be with the older girls. It wasn't long until I understood what the interest was in Frankie's room. It was the location. Her room was situated at the far end of the cottage, away from the matron's room and facing an open field. It was the perfect place for the girls to sneak out to meet boys at night. I thought that was deliciously scandalous but of course I would never do such a thing as sneak out at night. Besides, none of the boys were interested in me. One night in particular though, changed my mind a bit. As we sat on the floor talking girl talk and gossiping, one of the girls motioned to the window and grinned. As I followed her glance, I saw a head pop up in the window. A young man had come calling, and brought several of his friends with him. We were all in our nightgowns, but even so, some of the girls went straight to the window and leaned out to talk to the boys. The nightgowns we had on were of thin lawn material and if you stood in the light you could see right through them. I could clearly see the outline of the bodies of the girls leaning out the window, and thought that they were naughty to display themselves like that. Then, I did something that surprised me and everyone else. Knowing that boys were at the window, I went and stood before the mirror, raising my arms and acting like I was stretching. Glancing in the mirror, I could see that I had gotten the attention of some of the boys, and one in particular. With a wicked grin, I made sure that I gave them a clear view of my budding womanly charms. Mindy stomped over and grabbed my arm and yanked me out of the room. With great indignity she blasted me for acting like that. I became embarrassed and told her that I didn't know what came over me. Still fussing at me, Mindy shoved me down the hall and into our darkened room, shutting the door with a slam. Continuing her harangue, she told me that if the matron had caught me, I would have really been in trouble. As though she was predicting the future, we suddenly heard the matron's strident voice and stomping feet. She slammed into Frankie's room and caught the girls with the boys outside. The paddle wailed that night. Each girl caught outside the room with the boys was paddled severly and the screams rang throughout the cottage. I was sick with anxiety. Thank God that Mindy had yanked me out of that room and back to my senses. Nothing happened to me, and I supposed it was because the matron did not catch me in the room. I vowed never again to be so stupid, certainly never to do anything beyond my character just because I wanted to belong to a group. Sometimes though, I would relive the moment that I posed for the boys and would feel a delicious naughtyness within. I guess I was growing up.