Summer's End

I had such a wonderful week at the beach! I think it truly rates up there with Moondoggie and Gidget- almost to the expectation of my imagination. I was a bit upset over Henry and his quick departure, but the time I spent with him was proof positive that such things do happen. I would have lots of great things to tell Mindy and the other girls, and for once would be able to relate things that I had only heard them talk about. The day that Henry left, two things happened. First, Karen got caught in her bikini. I didn't rat her out, as fate would have it, her mother was just strolling along the water's edge and enjoying the day when she noticed a group of boys surrounding a young girl. It was apparent that the girl had pretty much nothing on, and Karen's mother felt a bit scandalized that any mother would allow her daughter to go out in public like that. Then, the unimaginable happened. A young man, eager to join the throng, ran up to Karen and called her by her name. When she heard the name "Karen", Karen's mother naturally looked to see if it was her daughter that the young man was addressing. To her shock and dismay, and then incredible anger, Karen's mother saw that it was her own chaste and innocent daughter that was surrounded by boys and practically naked! With a justified exclamation, Karen's mother stomped up to the group, picked up a beach towel and threw it over Karen's body. Then, with righteous indignation, she turned and blasted those boys, sending them sucrrying away in record time. Finally, she turned to Karen and for the next ten minutes, carped about trashy behavior behind Karen as they were going back to the hotel. Of course Karen was mortified, especially since her worst nightmare had come true. I was no where around, as I had gone with some girls I had met during the week. When I looked to see where Karen was, I noticed the absence of the boys and that Karen's spot on the beach was vacant. I was confused, but was enlightened when one of the girls told me that Karen's mother had come down and blasted Karen all the way back to the hotel. I began to worry that Karen's mother would blame me somehow for Karen's behavior, and wondered if I should go back to the hotel and face the music. I took my time, but finally, went back to the hotel room to find Karen weeping, her face red and eyes puffy. As soon as I walked in the room, Karen attacked me saying that it was all my fault that she had gotten caught. She claimed that if I had kept watch out like I should have, I could have warned her before her mother saw her. Before I could even respond to those rediculous accusations, Karen's mother came into the room and shaking a self-righteous finger in Karen's face, told her that it was her own fault that she was in trouble, parading around like a naked hussy for all the world to see. Why couldn't she be a nice girl like me, and keep her body covered so that people would not think their family was trash! By now I was in tears, and hated the contention going on. Karen's mother looked kindly at me and told me not to cry, I had done nothing wrong, indeed, I had shown Karen a good example. She then told Karen that she was confined to the hotel room for the rest of the day, and she was going to take me shopping at the little souvenier shops. I told her that I thought I should stay with Karen, but she insisted that I go with her. With a backward glance in Karen's direction, I followed Karen's mother out the door, down the hall and into the warm, sunny day. I tried to apologize for anything I might have done to upset her, and once again, she assurred me that it was Karen that had upset her, not me. I tried to enjoy my time with Karen's mother, but I felt so awkward about the whole situation. After awhile, I began to calm down and really began to have some fun. Then, the second thing happened that I will remember about that day. As we entered one of the souvenier shops, I was drawn once again to the preserved alligators that lined a whole shelf. Some of them had their mouths open showing thier sharp little teeth, and some of them had closed mouths. All of them had little black beady eyes and thick, dried alligator skins with differents pattens. Some were really large and others very small. The one thing they had in common was that I wanted one so very badly. I didn't have enough money to buy one, and so as in most cases of something I wanted, I just decided to enjoy looking at them while I could. I picked up one little alligator, about nine inches long and began to run my forefinger over it's rough exterior. I was enchanted by the tiny little claws and the alligator grin of it's little face. I felt sorry that someone had killed this little baby alligator just to make a souvenier out of him. While I was engrossed with these thoughts, Karen's mother came over to stand next to me. She asked me if I liked that little alligator, and I told her that I did. I admitted that I would love to have it for a memory of my wonderful vacation, and to my amazement, she told the clerk to wrap it up for me! She was buying that alligator for me! I could take it home, and just like I imagined, put it on the windowsill and remember the wonderful week I had spent in Florida. When the clerk handed me the wrapped package that held my little alligator, I hugged Karen's mother, thanking her for everything- the week in Florida, the fun I had been having, and most especially the little alligator. I don't remember much about the rest of the week, but Karen and her mother resolved their issues, I spent all the time I could on the beach, and when it was time to return, I carefully packed my alligator to take home with me. When we returned to the home, it was as if a magical time had come to an end and things would be returning to normal. Mindy was so surprised that I was so tan, and she said that I looked great! I basked in the limelight as I related my week in the sun, along with tales of Henry and everything we did together. The summer was coming to a quick end, and soon, school would be starting again. I didn't know it then but I would find that it would be an interesting and wonderful year.

Dream date

Morning could not come too soon for me! I awoke early, but I had to wait for Karen to be up and about, as her Mom would not let us go to the beach alone. She was afraid that some unscrupulous stranger would take advantage of us, we being such lovely innocents and all-(Boy did she not know her daughter!) I was very hungry as well, and decided to go to breakfast and let Karen sleep in for awhile. I thought that she would be awake when I got back, and we could go to the beach. I gobbled some eggs and a sweet roll, and when I got back from breakfast, Karen was still sleeping. I gently poked at her exposed foot, trying to get her to wake up. She just yanked her foot under the cover, and I stood there trying to hold my patience. Next, I tickled her arm, but she just rolled over. I whispered her name, but no response. I was getting impatient, I knew that Henry was waiting for me! Finally, I called her name rather loudly, and she shifted a bit. "whadaya want?" she mumbled. I told her to come on and get up, I wanted to go to the beach, but she said she didn't feel well. I asked her again, more earnestly, and she just rolled back over and pulled the covers over her head. I was getting desperate. I yanked the bedspread off of her and told her to get up. I wanted to be there with Henry, and she wasn't going to stop me! With a few unlady-like words, Karen glared at me, telling me that she had no reason to go to the beach, after all, I was the one with a boyfriend, not her! Quickly, I came up with a lie. I told her that Henry was bringing one of his friends to meet her and we would hang out together. That piqued her interest. I handed her one of her most scanty bikinis and told her that no one could resist her in something like that. By now, she was smiling, and had a crafty look on her face. Because she was dragging her feet, I began to throw towels, the bikini, sun tan lotion and t-shirts into our beach bag. Once again, I pressed her to hurry, and at last, after donning the ugly, one-piece swim suits that her mother insisted we wear, we finally found our way down the back stairs and on to the beach. We had not gone far, when I heard my name called. Looking back, I saw Karen's mom calling and motioning for us to return. Going back to her, I listened in horror as she told us that she wanted to spend the day at the beach with us. She thought it would be fun for just us girls to hang out together. She said we could build sand castles, lay in the sun, eat hot dogs and snow cones and suggested that Karen and I introduce her to out little friends. I saw my highly anticipated day shatter right before my eyes. Both Karen and I had a problem with her mom's plans for the day. In no way was Karen going to be seen on the beach in such an ugly swim suit, and I knew that I could not hang out with Henry if Karen's mom was there. Just as I thought I was going to break down and cry, something wonderful happened. I guess the summer beach fairy was looking after me, because right then, Karen's dad came down the stairs dressed in bermuda shorts, boat shoes, a t-shirt and had a camera slung about his neck. With a booming, cheerful greeting, he told us that he was going sight-seeing and invited us to join him. Karen quickly spoke up and told her dad that she thought it would be a good idea if just he and her mom went together and let us just spend the day at the beach. She added that they did not ever have much time to be alone, and, waggling her eyebrows in a suggestive manner, said that it would be romantic for them to spend the day together. (She had such a silver tongue!). Her mom looked at her dad and smiling, said that it sounded good to her. She insisted that she didn't want to leave us all alone like that, but we assured her that we would have fun and not to worry. In no time at all, Karen's parents were gone to their sight-seeing, and we were on our way to the beach once again. As soon as we were out of sight of her parents, Karen pulled her genie act and snaked into the tiny bikini that we had smuggled from the hotel. I was amazed at the fact that such a small amount of fabric could even cover the vital parts of Karen's body. Next to her physical perfection, I felt like a whale, but then I remembered that Henry was waiting for me and he had said that he liked me just the way I was. As I ran along the expanse of the white sands of the beach looking for Henry, once again I was amazed that I had been given the opportunity of having a vacation such as this. Karen had found her usual gaggle of admirers (I guess she had forgotten about my little white lie) and I went, as usual by myself to see what the day would bring. Before long, I heard my name called. It was Henry! He was running along the beach, calling and waving to me. The dream continued. There was actually a boy that wanted to be with me! As we met by the water's edge, Henry told me that he had the day planned for us. After spending some time with our friends, he wanted to go to the shops and look around. After that, we could get some lunch, and then he had a surprise for me. I was so excited, and I thought if only Mindy could see me now! The morning passed quickly, and soon we were on our way to the little shops that lined the main street where the beach began. Once again, I was enchanted by all the souveniers available. The tiny preserved alligators stared at us as we passed by, and I thought again how much I wished I could take one home with me. Carved coconut monkeys grinned at me in passing, as if they knew that I was having a special time. In one shop, Henry picked up a large conch shell and put it to his ear. His face lit up with a huge smile, and he told me that he could hear the sea. I asked if that was all he could hear, and he said no, that he could also hear the shell telling him that I was special to him. I blushed radiantly, no boy had ever spoken to me like that before! We left the shop and strolled past other shops, most of them offering the same souveniers. As we came to one shop however, I noticed that they were advertising salt-water taffy. I told Henry that I had never had salt-water taffy, and he suggested that we go in and try some. Inside the store was a counter lined with striped taffy candy in several colors and sizes. Off to the side of the counter was a machine that was "pulling" taffy, or in other words, stretching long ropes of candy over and over. It was amazing to see the candy lighten up in color and it was stretched. Most of the colors were pastel pinks, greens, blues and yellow with stripes of white running through them. Some of it was chocolate, vanilla or strawberry, and were in solid colors. After the taffy was stretched, it was rolled into long snake shapes and cut into small, round pieces. Then, a worker would wrap each piece by hand and throw it into a bin of the same color. From each bin, the candy was packed into lovely foil boxes to be sold. There were free samples of the taffy, and I eagerly chose a pink piece. Popping it into my mouth, I was surprised at the sticky sweetness of the taffy. Noting my surprised look, Henry asked me what I was thinking. I told him that I thought that since it was salt-water taffy, it should have had a salty taste. The clerk heard me and explained that it was only called salt-water taffy because it was usually sold only at the beach. I loved the sweet, vanilla taste of the taffy, and found myself pulling it from my teeth with my tongue as I tried to eat it. Before long, the taffy had dissolved, and I wished that I had another piece. Before I could say anything, Henry pulled out some change and had the clerk fill a small bag with pieces of taffy of each color. Smiling, he handed me the bag and told me to enjoy myself. All I could think was that I would never eat all of that precious candy, because Henry had bought it for me and I wanted to keep some to remember him by. Soon after we left the taffy store, Henry led me to a small cafe where we had corn dogs and cokes for lunch. I felt like the heroine in a romantic movie as I enjoyed each moment in Henry's company. He was so sweet to me, and I never wanted the day to end. After lunch, I found that the surprise that Henry had for me was to rent a bicycle built for two. We rode all over the shopping area with the wind blowing in our faces and the sun beating down on us. It was magical. Finally, we turned the bike back in and went back to the beach. Sitting at the water's edge, we sat in companionable silence while I thought of the wonderful day. Dusk was falling and the night beach goers were coming out. Campfires were being lit and the smell of roasting marshmallows and hot dogs permeated the air. The wave gently rolled in and out and the smell of salt caressed the breeze. Stars began to blink in the dusky sky. How could anything be any better? Henry and I talked of nothing in particular, but we held hands. Then, I knew it was time to go in, and as much as I would have spent the whole night sitting on the beach and talking to Henry, I also knew that it could not be. So, I stood up and told Henry that I had to go and find Karen and go on back to the hotel. Henry took my hand and looked into my eyes, and I knew that the time had come for a kiss from him. But as everything else in my life, the magic had to come to an end. As we stood face to face, Henry quietly told me that he and his family were returning home the next day. It took a moment for that information to register, and then I asked him why he had waited until the last minute to tell me that he was leaving the next day. He told me that he did not want to spoil our last day together. I asked him if he would write to me, and he told me no, he didn't think that we could sustain a long-distance relationship like that. Giving me a hug, he told me he enjoyed our time together and he would never forget me. And, just like that, the dream was over. I could not believe that I had only known him for two wonderful days! It seemed much longer. I found Karen and she changed back into her "proper" swimsuit. Together we walked back to the hotel, and noticing that I was quiet, she let me be alone with my thoughts. I don't know what I thought would come of the magical days on the Florida beach with Henry, but I knew I would always remember the farm boy that made me feel so special.

Still on Vacation

It was the second day in Florida. I had a sunburn. I didn't think I would burn, I only wanted to tan, but I guess it is easier to burn at the beach. It wasn't a bad sunburn, just enough to make me realize I had one each time I moved my arms, legs, feet, hands, smiled, blinked or moved in anyway. I didn't consider it a problem, I had too much to do. Karen had amassed quite a following and I hung out with her just to enjoy the view. So many young, buff bodies; tall, short, blonde, dark, red headed, blue eyes, green eyes, brown eyes, freckles, you know, all the good stuff. Something wonderful happened to me that week, I became noticed. Some of the less shallow boys actually talked to me and spent time with me. I discovered volleyball, frisbee, wave diving and so much more as I spent that week at the beach. There were other girls that were ordinary, friendly girls and together we formed a group with some of the other young men. I had so much fun, just being me and not worrying about trying to impress anyone. All day we talked and walked along the beach, played vollyball and romped in and out of the water. In the evenings, we sat around beach campfires, roasting marshmallows and telling stories. I hated to have to go in, as I wanted to stay all night with my friends. Karen and I shared a secret; she was not the little angel her parents thought she was. I didn't care. That was her business. As long as no one asked, I wouldn't rat her out. Besides, I had my group and she had hers. One evening, Karen and her family took me out to dinner and a walk through town. The air had cooled but the humidity was still up. My hair was sticking to my neck and my toes were sweating in my sandals as we walked in and out of the shops. I soon forgot my discomfort as I was surrounded by lovely treasures from the sea. There were so many beautiful shells, and items made of shells. In one shop, skirts and tops of tropical beauty were on display. Teeny little bikinis beamed in bright colors and beach wraps were displayed next to them. In every shop there were little alligators that had been preserved and were in various poses. Their mouths were always open to display sharp little teeth, and they had little glass eyes. Sometimes they were just alligator heads, and sometimes they were whole alligators. I wanted an alligator. I could just see the kids at the home as they admired my alligator. I would put it on the windowsill next to my bed and pretend it was a pet. But, those alligators were expensive and I knew that I would not be able to have one. I decided that one day I would have a preserved alligator, and that made me feel better. I wanted to buy souveniers for my brothers, Mindy, Mrs. Thompson and even the matron. Fortunately, There were plenty of affordable items for me to buy, and I carefully chose something for everyone on my list. Shell necklaces, shark teeth, bracelets, so many things. And, when I wasn't shopping, I was down at the beach. On the third day I got up early once again and hurried down to the water. I loved the early morning sunrise, the waves undulating in and out, the crabs scurrying everywhere and the smell of the ocean. That morning, I just sat and experienced the beach and the water. As the tide came in, the water covered me just a tiny bit deeper each time the waves rushed in. I knew that I would have to go back to the home in just a few days, and I just wanted to make memories. Then, I heard a slight splash as a young man plopped down next to me. He was cute. He had red hair, freckles and was ordinarily just right. He looked at me and grinned. He told me that he hoped I would be there and wanted to spend the day with me. I was surprised, I didn't think any of the boys had really even noticed me for myself. I did interact with other boys as they talked to the group I hung out with, but this was different. His name was Henry and he was from Ohio. He and his family were on vacation for the week just like me. They would be going home on Sunday, and I would be going back on Saturday. We talked and talked. After a while, Henry told me he was hungry and was going for a hotdog. He asked me what I wanted, but I felt shy and didn't want to eat in front of him. He brought me a hotdog and a soda anyway, telling me that he liked to see a girl eat, especially one like me who was strong and healthy. Henry told me that the girls at home were more like me and he didn't care for girls who were skinny. I didn't know how to take that, but the look on his face was one of admiration, not censure. The day wore on, and we joined out group for beach games. Henry stayed close to me. Some of the other girls openly admired him behind his back, and when we were alone begged for details. Did he kiss me? How did I meet him? Did he have a brother? Laughing, I told them that we were just friends, but inside I hoped that he would want to keep in touch with me after that magical week came to an end. That night, as the campfire burned in the dark, Henry sat next to me on a beach blanket. I was so happy, I was one of the fortunate ones who actually had a boy to claim me. He roasted a marshmallow for me and took it off the coathanger so I would not burn my fingers. Leaning in closer, he blew on the crispy, melted blob and then placed it in my mouth. Looking into my eyes, he licked the sweetness from his fingers. I stuttered, "I love marshmallows!" and he said he did too. As the other couples paired off, Henry gave me a meaningful look. I knew that he wanted to go for a walk and be alone, and I was nervous. I had never been alone with a boy before, but I didn't want to seem childish, so placing my hand in his, I stood up. While we held hands, we walked along the water's edge. The night was magical to me. The hotel lights gleamed into the night and music played from radios on the sand. The wind caressed my face and the night seemed to belong to only us. Could this be happening to me? I couldn't believe it, but indeed I truly was walking along the water with a boy that was cute and liked me. Henry did not try to kiss me. I would have died if he had, I would have had a heart attack. We just walked and talked and eventually went back to the group at the fire. It was late, and I had to go in, but Karen was still out and I knew that as long as she was there, I could be too. Finally, we had to go in. All the way back to the hotel, my heart skipped to the beat of "Henry, Henry". Karen wanted to know all the details. How did I find a boyfriend? As she asked the usual other questions, I realized that she had not paired up with anyone so far that week. I couln't understand that at all. Lots of boys were trying to get her attention and she was always surrounded by them. I gathered my courage and asked her why she hadn't chosen one of them. She told me that boys never seemed to want to get serious with her and worse, girls were jealous of her. I had my own opinion as to why that could be true, but I just sympathized with her and told her about Henry. Karen told me that she thought I was lucky to have found someone like him. In my mind, I thought she was lucky to be so beautiful. Before we got back to the hotel, Karen had slipped back into her one-piece swim suit and back into her "good girl" role for her parents. I thought it would be hard to keep up with the deception and again resolved that I would not to rat her out. Time would tell, and anyway, being at the beach was a life away from the normal. As I got ready for bed, I was already looking forward to seeing Henry the next day. As I said my prayers, I thanked Heavenly Father for getting to meet Henry. What a wonderful gift it was, to be able to be one of the "lucky girls" that had found a boyfriend. Sleep finally claimed me as I imagined all the fun the next day would bring.

The Beach

I could hardly wait for the next morning. I was kept awake by imagining the summer week on the beach that lay before me. My mind was filled with thoughts of Gidget and Moondoggie and Frankie and Annette. Yes, I could hardly wait for the morning to come.
Morning did come, and after a quick breakfast, Karen and I headed straight to the beach. Karen was the teen girl in the family that had brought me to the beach for a week's vacation. She was tall and dark, with a great figure. Her stomach was flat and her hips narrow. She was blessed with quite a chest and her full, long dark hair reached to her waist. To top it off, she had the cutest dimples, and a dusting of freckles on her nose and cheeks. She and I both had on a one-piece swim suit, and that was because her mother insisted and because that was all I had brought with me. I didn't care, I just wanted to be on the beach, in the water and boy watching. As we ran along the sand, I could hear the waves lapping and once again, the scent of the ocean assaulted my senses. Everywhere I looked, couples walked hand in hand, children played on the beach, parents sunned themselves in close proximity to thier children and even a few dogs ran in and out of the waves. Buffed young men batted volley balls while toned young women admired them. Most of the girls were wearing bikinis, some of them very brief. Other girls were dressed like me and some of them were quite chubby. For a moment, I lost my confidence as I considered that perhaps I looked like them. Looking down at my almost flat stomach and large but firm thighs I decided that I was who I was and couldn't change anything right then. I did wish that my breasts were bigger, but that was something I just wasn't graced with. I asked Karen what she wanted to do, and she said she wanted to sun for awhile. She asked me if I could be trusted. I said of course I could, why did she want to know? With a grin, she reached into her beach bag and pulled out a large beach towel. She gave me the towel and told me to unfold it and hold it up in front of her. I did as she asked, and she once again reached into her beach bag. Curious, I peeked to see what she was holding, and all I could see was a couple of colorful fabric scraps. Why, that was the tiniest bikini I had ever seen! Laughing at the expression on my face, Karen snaked out of her one piece and into that bikini. She changed right there on the beach, but she was so fast, she was covered before I could even gasp. There she stood, her magnificent chest barely covered and her bottom snugly but scantily gracing what should have fit a four-year-old. Her belly button was even cute, and she was really something. Lastly, she pulled out a large t-shirt and tossed it down on the towel. She explained that in the unlikely event that her parents came down to the beach, she could quickly cover up. Lying back on the towel, she looked like a water nymph, and to give the best effect possible, she spread her long thick hair out around her. Well, now I really began to feel like a dowd. But there were unexpected benefits to having Karen exposed. Before long, some young men began to gravitate over to us. The Karen I had met on the trip down to Florida dissappeared, and a sultry, exotic and very attractive man magnet appeared. Suddenly I knew how it must have felt to be in the presence of Scarlette O'Hara at the bar-b-que. Never having been in such a situation, I was content to sit and watch her work the crowd. There were at least six boys to begin with and she introduced me to them. They gave me a perfunctory hello, but for the most part I was just a decoration in the Karen show. After a while of watching those boys preen and pose for her, I decided to walk down to the water and look for shells. Karen didn't even know I had gone. My cheerfulness returned quickly as I walked in the waves. Tiny little shells were everywhere, and I thought that maybe I could find a large seashell to take back to Mindy. I guess it didn't occur to me that there would be no large shells with all of the tourists. Many of them were looking for shells too. Finally, I just sat down on the water's edge and let the waves lap over me. I didn't know what to expect on this first time ever at the ocean's edge, but I was surprised at the different things going on all at once. There was brown seaweed floating over and under the water, and touching it, I found that it felt like weeds on the land. The sand quickly got into my swimsuit and began to itch in the most embarrassing places. The waves actually lifted me as they came up on shore, and tiny little crabs scurried out of the way as they avoided me. There were sea birds diving and screeching, dipping up and down on black tipped wings that were pointed at the end. Once in awhile, one of them would successfully snatch something from the water, while others continued to try to find their breakfast. The wind was soothing and warm, scented with the smells of the ocean, something fishy, sun tanning lotion and concession food from the vendors on the beach. Before we had left the hotel room, Karen's mother gave us some money in case we needed it. Now I knew why. I became curious as to the offerings of the vendors, and walked away from the water to the concession stands. There was the usual tourist fare, offering cold drinks, snow cones, hot dogs and french fries and corn dogs. A community ketchup bottle had drips of ketchup running from the mouth of the bottle, and some of it was drying in the warm air. There were several kinds of chips and candy bars kept in the freezer. Finally, I saw the ice cream stand that already had a line of swimmers waiting for a cold treat. The trash cans were open and when people were not near them, birds would swoop down hoping for a treasure. There were signs everywhere telling tourists not to feed the birds, and I soon realized that if the birds were enticed with food, they would poop everywhere as they tried to get to it. Looking beyond the concession stands, I saw a line of souvenier shops. These shops lined a street at the beginning of the beach and I felt a little thrill of excitement at the thought of walking through to see what they offered. Looking back at the beach, I saw that Karen was surrounded by even more boys and decided that she would not want to be disturbed. I wished Mindy was with me, she would have had so much fun in the shops. I decided to find her a little souvenier if I could. Before long, I found myself in a tourist's wonderland. There were so many different items, it would take all day to see everything. I decided to just visit the first store on the strand and see if Karen would like to go with me later to see the others. The first store was completly open to the front, with souveniers hanging to entice passerbys. There were flip-flop sandals in all colors, colorful Hawiian leis, t-shirts and beach bags. Further in the shop I saw the entire back wall covered with shelves holding seashells of all sizes. Some of them were huge, but looking at the prices, I knew that I would not be able to get one of them. Next to the seashells were displays of items made from seashells. There were tiny little glass bottles with seashells in them. Some of the bottles had tiny shark's teeth. There were seashell animal creations, starfish of all sizes and necklaces with shell pendants. I saw bracelets and rings too, and hoped I could get something like that for Mindy. Yes, there were so many things to see, but I was just hypnotized by the carved coconut shells. There before my eyes were coconut shells carved into monkeys. Really, they were very ugly, but to my young eyes, they were wonderful. Some of them had hair, some were large and some were small, but all of them were fabulous. Somehow, I would take a carved coconut monkey home with me. I didn't know it then, but there were other wonderful souveniers to see in other shops. The monkeys were great, but not as great as some of the other things that I would see in the days that followed.

The end of Summer

Well, the summer of that year was coming to an end, and I was looking forward to returning to highschool. I was going to be in the 9th grade, and was excited about returning to my friends in Hapeville. I was not as heavy as I was when I went into the home, and with all the experiences and things that had shaped me over that last year, I was more confident. One thing was to happen though, that brought a wonderful end to the summer.
Just about half way through August, the matron called me in and told me that a family wanted to take me on vacation with them. They were going to Florida for a week and wanted one of the kids from the home to go along with their family. I was going to get to spend a whole week at the beach! I had never been to the beach before, and I was so excited. Before I knew it, the weekend had come and I was on my way with a sweet family that had two teenagers, a boy and a girl. The girl was my age, and she was very nice. We drove the long trip to Florida on a hot Saturday morning, traveling south through Georgia, along a country highway. Each side of the highway was dotted with farms, with grass growing verdant and green. Some of that intense green was due to sweet potato plants that covered miles of farmland. Elsewhere fat cattle roamed slowly looking for shade, and long rows of plowed earth erupted with cotton plants. It looked like it had snowed. Fat cotton bolls fluffed out and reached for the sun in a never ending landscape that held the history of Georgia agriculture. You could almost see black slaves bending over long, heavy sacks, hand picking the cotton and filling the bags. But, that cotton was destined to be harvested by modern machinery, and hand picked cotton was thankfully relegated to the imagination. There were huge peanut fields too, with large green leaves blocking out the earth, and chubby peanuts growing underground. The father of the family pulled over to the side of the road by a peanut farm, and pulled up a peanut plant. The peanuts were growing on the roots, and that plant had about ten large peanut pods connected to it. He asked me if I had ever tasted a fresh peanut, and I said no. He pulled the shell from a peanut, and the nuts buried inside fell into his hand. There was about six nuts to each pod, and they were pink and moist, and nothing like I had ever seen. I had only had roasted peanuts, and was pleasantly surprised when I bit down into a fresh peanut. It was slightly sweet and not crunchy at all, but soft and rubbery. I really liked the taste, and asked for some more, but the father told me that if you are not used to fresh peanuts, you could get tummy trouble if you ate too many. Soon after we stopped at the peanut farm, we had a picnic for lunch and went on our way. We finally crossed the Florida state border, and there was a large cement marker welcoming everyone to Florida. The son in the family took an opportunity to play a prank on me. He told me that Florida was full of alligators and he had seen a dead alligator along the side of the road. He said there were so many alligators, and that cars and trucks ran over them all the time. I was looking from side to side, and front and back trying to find an alligator, when he poked me and told me to look. He pointed out what I was sure was a huge dead alligator, and I squealed with delight to see my first wild alligator, never mind that it was road kill. I scrambled for my camera to get a photo souvenier, and realized that everyone was chuckling. With suspicion, I asked what was so funny! The mother of the family kindly told me that there was no dead alligator on the side of the road, but only a tire tread that had come off a semi-truck. Sure enough, that is exactly what it was! We all had a good laugh, and the father assured me that if I watched out carefully, I could very well see a live alligator. The day wore on as we traveled to our destination. It was Panama City Florida. It was getting dark as we arrived, but since the hotel was right on the beach, I begged for a moment to run to the water. I had never seen the ocean before, and the mother told her children and me to go ahead and see the beach. With gratitude, I sprang from the car and ran across the sand, the water's edge being my destination. Several things will forever be in my mind about that moment in my life. First,the scent of the ocean surrounded me. It was fresh and fishy at the same time. The waves made slight roaring sounds and the creamy swells climbed over and over onto the beach. The breeze was warm and ruffled my hair. I wanted to get my feet into that water and then I realized how hard it is to run in sand. That was a surprise. The soft grains worked against my feet and made it difficult to get good traction. The more I tried to run, the more sand got in my shoes. Finally, I just took my shoes and socks off and carried them. Now, I felt the heat from the day in the sand. How warm the sand was, and how it molded to my feet. Soon, I had reached the edge of the water. It was a magic moment as the first waves gently lapped over my feet and receeded. It seemed that the water was a living thing. In spite of the heat of the evening, the water was cool and soothing. I thought how nice it would be just to sit right down and let the water flow over my whole body. I couldn't have done that because I still had my clothes on and didn't want to get them wet. While experiencing my first moment at the beach, I realized that many people were swimming even though it was getting dark. Looking around, I saw that there were no little children, but lots of teenagers and young adults. Everywhere couples were paired together, holding hands, walking along the waves or romancing on beach blankets. Squeals and laughter came from those who were splashing in the deeper water, and there were even a few campfires. Oh, I could imagine myself as one of those who were having so much fun! I could not have known the wonderful week that awaited me. I have much to tell you.

A New Move

It seemed that summer was just full of surprises. First my trip to the peach farm, then the explosion and then my risque venture into a minor attempt at exhibition. But nothing compared with the news that awaited all of us as July came to an end. One evening at dinner, the matron announced that the campus was moving. The whole campus! For some time the sponsors of the home had been building a brand new campus about 40 miles south of Atlanta and we were due to move around the first week in August. After that, all we could do was scramble around and get our things together. Within no time, it seemed that our whole world was turned upside down. It only took a few days, but with lots of organization and work, each cottage was emptied and we moved to a lovely new campus in the country. What a difference! The whole compound was located in the middle of acres and acres of farmland with cows, horses and crops surrounding the land the campus was built on. Close by, there was a small town named Palmetto, and it only had a few stores. I thought that Hapeville was small, but it was a bustling town compared to this one. The girl's campus was built in a cul de sac two miles from the boys campus. In the middle of the campus was a pool, a huge gymnasium, the main offices and several buildings that housed campus officials, including a social worker. We even had a church building right on campus! The new cottages were two storied, with sleeping rooms and the visiting room on the top floor. Really, this was the main floor, as the cottages were built on hillsides and the basement only appeared from behind the cottage. On the bottom floor was the kitchen, laundry, game room and the matron's rooms. Upstairs, or on the mail floor, were our rooms where we shared four girls to a room and a bath with the other room next to us. We had air conditioning! And color TV. It was the first time in my life I had had either air conditioning or color tv. The kitchen was a stainless steel wonder and there was a drain in the floor so that all we had to do was scrub the floor and rinse it with a hose. No more back breaking mopping, rinsing and changing the water several times. The refrigerator was huge, and held much more than the other one. We also had a large freezer, and food could be delivered once a week instead of everyday. Everything smelled new and wonderful. How I loved the game room. It had sofas lining the wall with fat cushions that we sat on when we wanted to watch tv on the floor. Instead of the vinyl floor of the old home, these cottages were carpeted. There were bright lamps that gave a welcome when you walked into a room. Everything was new and exciting, but many changes had been made. The first thing I realized was that I had left the birds back at the other campus. Since this new campus was out in the country, there were so many birds that it was hard to distinguish the ones close by. And, since we had air conditioning, I couldn't leave the window open to hear them. There would be no more walks into the lovely town of Hapeville. No more opportunity to peer into the jewlery store window display on my way to school, nor to walk through the pharmacy. No more soda fountain treats, no more time at the feed store. No, we were out in the country, with lovely acres surrounding us, but nothing that was familiar. Everything was modern and new, but nothing was comforting. It would take time. We still attended the high school in Hapeville, as there was no high school close by. We would walk the mile to the entrance of the campus and ride 40 miles into Hapeville each way. We walked that mile each way rain or shine, hot or cold. Since Mindy and I walked together, it didn't seem so long. All along the route to Hapeville each day, we counted many cows and passed farmhouses. Since we had to ride so far, we usually didn't get home until it began to be dark. It was all so different. We had only been on the new campus for two weeks and not yet started back to school, when it was time to celebrate the annual homecoming picnic. People came from all over who had been residents or workers in the years past. The home sponsored a huge picnic, with an abundance of food, and a tour of the new campus. I couldn't believe that some of those old people that visited had been kids at one time in the home. The day was a hot Sunday in August, and after attending a capacity filled airconditioned Sunday service, we all filed out to begin the picnic. Each of the older kids had been assigned as campus tour guides. We were not allowed to change from our Sunday clothes, and as hot as it was, I was pretty miserable. I wore the girdle and stockings and dress blouse and skirt. My bra pinched as well and I could feel sweat trickling down my spine as I smiled answered questions to those I had been assigned to give a tour. I was hungry as well, and looked forward to tucking into the picnic treats that loaded the tables inside the new gym. Finally I found time to get a plate of food and sit down. I was especially glad to sit at last as my back and stomach had been cramping and that just added to the difficulty that I was having. I was a real trooper at smiling in spite of feeling bad, and that day was no different. Smiling and laughing, greeting visitors and calling to friends, the afternoon wore on. Finally, I had to go to the bathroom, and giving an excuse, I slipped into one of the girls rooms at the gymnasium. The bathroom stalls were roomy and new. I remember thinking that it was really nice to have such nice bathrooms, and once in a stall, I went to work peeling off the girdle and my panties so that I could relieve myself. The reason that I so clearly remember something so mundane as a trip to the girls room is because on that day, at that time, once I was seated, I received the shock of my life. Mother nature had finally come to visit. There, right before my eyes, was the proof that I was finally a woman! Secretly, I had worried that something was terribly wrong with me because I had turned fourteen and not started my cycles. I couldn't talk to anyone, not even Mindy. I was so afraid that I was different from the other girls, and just kept it to myself. But no, at last, I was just like everyone else. I wanted to shout it to anyone who would listen, but that would not have been the thing to do, and then I realized that since I never told anyone that I had not had cycles, I could not tell them now that I did. Now would have been a good time to have a mother to turn to. I was pretty naive, and did not figure out that since I had never asked for sanitary products, the matron and Mrs. Thompson knew I had not needed them. This was getting more and more difficult. Well, I decided to just go and tell Mrs. Thompson everything and be done with it. She was so sweet, and gave me the needed supplies. I was so happy, I felt so special. I was a woman at last! A woman with female trouble from the start. I would soon find that being a woman was no fun, and in my case, just plain miserable. Along with miserable cramps, I got crabby. I cried for no reason, and got a small case of acne. What the heck? Where was the wonder of womanhood? Not with me, that's for sure. And the bad thing was, it happened each month! I think I recall that the school nurse told us in the "special meeting for girls" that we would be only slightly inconvienced each month. She lied. I was beginning to see that the future could hold some challenges! It was shortly after moving to the new campus that something else wonderful happened. I began to correspond with my father. I had written to my grandmother who is his mother and she gave me his address. He was still in prison, but I could write to him and he wrote back. We began to get to know each other again. I tried to forget my fears of him, and learn to know the man that was in my life at that time. What I didn't know was that he would soon be released. He had a new life ahead of him, and for a while, that life did not include me. It was not that he didn't want me, he just had to start over. We wrote and I looked for his letters. I wished that he was free to come and get me. Someday, I knew he would drive up to the cottage and be with me on visiting day. It seems that young, teenaged girls can have quite an imagination. These things did happen for me but not for a very long time. Meanwhile, my naturally positive spirit took over and I did my best to enjoy each day of my life. The move to the new campus brought change and new experience. Many of those experiences would prove to be such that would mold me into the person I would become.

Summer Days

For those of you who may be following my story, I have not been writing because I was so distressed over Rocky, (our german shepherd) and his getting lost. He is home now and all is fine, buy I cried myself sick while he was gone, and it really affected me. Now, back to the story.

I left you at the peach farm. I had a wonderful time there, got along so well with the family and learned so much. We swam in the creek, (in our underwear!) and I imagined that the handsome older son liked me. He was so incredible, so tall with his muscular body and golden blonde hair. I looke all I wanted behind his back, but when he talked to me, I just dissolved in fits of giggles. I was such a girl! But new feelings were blooming inside me and I didn't know how to handle them. The girls and I took long walks along country roads, and at night, we talked and giggled, and swore that when I had to go back to the home, we would write and keep in touch. I was there at the farm for two weeks and loved every moment. On the last day, the mother asked me if I would like to live with them. I answered enthusiastically that I would, but I never thought it was any more than just a question. When we got into the car to go back to the home, the girls and I cried and hugged and repeated the vow that we would keep in touch. It was a very hot day in June when I went back home and I got terribly car sick on the way. I found myself on several occasions leaning over the pavement while I retched and heaved. After a while, it was just dry heaving, but I could not seem to stop. I have always had a problem with motion sickness, and this time I was just so embarrassed because the family had been so good to me. Each time I had to get out of the car, the mother would help me by wiping my face and holding me up. I realized just how kind she was, and I thought that perhaps it would be a wonderful life to live with this family. The steamy Georgia countryside drummed by as we drove south to the home. It was so cool and refreshing in the northern part of the state, but as we continued toward Hapeville, it seemed to become more and more muggy and miserable. When we arrived at the home, the mother took my things and walked me inside the cottage. She looked around my room and admired the few things I had aquired, especially remarking on my stuffed pig that kept it's vigil on the pillow on my bed. Standing in my room, she took me in her ample arms and told me that everything would be alright. I knew I would never see her again, and I sniffed my goodbye to her. I hugged her and told her that I had really enjoyed my time with her family, and that I would miss them. Again, she embraced me and told me that Heavenly Father would provide for me. She got in the car and they drove off, while I watched until the tail light dissapeared onto the highway. I later found out that this family had offered to adopt me, but my mother would not agree. I had mixed feelings about that. I had a wonderful reunion with Mindy, she had not gone anywhere yet that summer and had been alone while I was gone. I had so much to tell her. I embellished a bit about my "relationship" with the older boy and Mindy ohhhed and ahhhed at each detail. We were so glad to be together again, and talked about our plans for the rest of the summer. One day soon after my return home, a terrible thing happened. Mindy and I were out in the yard sunning ourselves, when we heard a terrific boom and the ground shook beneath us. We jumped up in fright and ran inside to see what awful thing must have happened. It was indeed awful, but not at the home. Close by, behind the campus of the home was a nursery filled with babies and small children along with the nursery workers. A gas line had ruptured, and the building exploded with everyone inside. Within minutes, sirens were screaming to the scene and everything was in chaos. The smoke was billowing above the nearby trees and Mindy and I rushed to go and see what had happened. The trail behind the campus leading to the nursery was not very long, and it didn't take long to reach a scene that I will never forget. There before me was what was left of a large two story building, some of the walls having collapsed and the rest in flames. Firefighters were on the scene and ambulances were lining up on the street. When we were spotted by a firefighter, he told us to get on home and get out of the way. I wish I had listened to him, but I didn't and Mindy and I sneaked behind a fence that had partially collapsed. Peering over the top of what remained of the fence, I was shocked to find little bodies blackened and scattered on the ground and even body parts. There was a hand and part of a leg. I noticed little shoes too, and toys. A teddy bear was lying in a puddle and other toys were black and smoking. Parents had begun to arrive and were trying to get into the burning building for their children. One mother in particular was absolutely hysterical, screaming for her baby. There was so much screaming and it seemed that the sirens of the ambulances and the wailing of the victims seemed to blend in together. I don't know how many were killed or injured, because it didn't take long for my mind to kind of shut down from the shock. I do remember someone grabbing my shoulder and yanking me away from the fence. Once again, Mindy and I were told to go home, but my legs did not seem to want to carry me. I trembled like a leaf in a hurricane and my teeth chattered as I gasped for breath. I knew I was sobbing, and must have mirrored the terror on Mindy's face. Together we staggered away from the awful scene, crying and gagging all the way back home. What a horrible thing to have happened to those little children. It would be a long time before I could think of the incident and not become very upset. It was the talk of the home for quite some time, but I could never join in. Talking about it made it seem real all over again, and I just wanted to forget.
The summer passed on, lazy and hot. We swam in the pool, played cards and watched tv. I learned how interesting a soap opera can be. The older girls watched them every day, and I soon became interested as well. My favorite one was called "Another World". I learned to love Rachel and Russel, the main characters of the story along with Ada, Rachel's mother. I finally had something to talk about with all the girls as we compared our opinions of the cast and story of the soaps. At night, we would pop corn and visit in each other's rooms. One room in particular was Frankie's room. She was still the cottage alpha dog, and the girls migrated to her room most of the time. I ventured in one night and no one seemed to object. Soon, I was involved in the conversation and began to enjoy myself. After that, Mindy and I went often to Frankie's room to be with the older girls. It wasn't long until I understood what the interest was in Frankie's room. It was the location. Her room was situated at the far end of the cottage, away from the matron's room and facing an open field. It was the perfect place for the girls to sneak out to meet boys at night. I thought that was deliciously scandalous but of course I would never do such a thing as sneak out at night. Besides, none of the boys were interested in me. One night in particular though, changed my mind a bit. As we sat on the floor talking girl talk and gossiping, one of the girls motioned to the window and grinned. As I followed her glance, I saw a head pop up in the window. A young man had come calling, and brought several of his friends with him. We were all in our nightgowns, but even so, some of the girls went straight to the window and leaned out to talk to the boys. The nightgowns we had on were of thin lawn material and if you stood in the light you could see right through them. I could clearly see the outline of the bodies of the girls leaning out the window, and thought that they were naughty to display themselves like that. Then, I did something that surprised me and everyone else. Knowing that boys were at the window, I went and stood before the mirror, raising my arms and acting like I was stretching. Glancing in the mirror, I could see that I had gotten the attention of some of the boys, and one in particular. With a wicked grin, I made sure that I gave them a clear view of my budding womanly charms. Mindy stomped over and grabbed my arm and yanked me out of the room. With great indignity she blasted me for acting like that. I became embarrassed and told her that I didn't know what came over me. Still fussing at me, Mindy shoved me down the hall and into our darkened room, shutting the door with a slam. Continuing her harangue, she told me that if the matron had caught me, I would have really been in trouble. As though she was predicting the future, we suddenly heard the matron's strident voice and stomping feet. She slammed into Frankie's room and caught the girls with the boys outside. The paddle wailed that night. Each girl caught outside the room with the boys was paddled severly and the screams rang throughout the cottage. I was sick with anxiety. Thank God that Mindy had yanked me out of that room and back to my senses. Nothing happened to me, and I supposed it was because the matron did not catch me in the room. I vowed never again to be so stupid, certainly never to do anything beyond my character just because I wanted to belong to a group. Sometimes though, I would relive the moment that I posed for the boys and would feel a delicious naughtyness within. I guess I was growing up.